Tone Parsons

It’s a Christmas™ Miracle

On Wednesday of last week, it started snowing.

It didn’t stop snowing until Friday.  After all was said and done, we had gotten around 27 inches (68.6 cm) of the white fluffy crap.  While having snow for Christmas™ is great, that much all at once wasn’t.

My car, while it has all wheel drive, also has air dams and such, leaving very little clearance between the road and it’s lowest point.  This means that when there’s an ass load of snow on the ground, we’re pretty much stuck where we are (or risk ripping chunks off the car).  Essentially, we’ve been stuck in the house since last Thursday.

Here’s a few pictures of the damage… click on the thumbnails for a larger view:

While this is pretty and all, being trapped because the road sucked much butt was a pain in the butt.  Thank goodness we have a deep freezer full of food!

But then, last night… something amazing finally happened…. the city plows came to our dead end street!!  This was only, of course, after my neighbor called and yelled at them.  Thank you, neighbor!!!  I was starting to get concerned because I run out of my meds tonight and the perscription has been filled and waiting at the pharmacy since last week.  Now we’ll be able to pick them up!  Also… I haven’t been able to ship any Christmas™ packages yet… so they may be late (sorry Dad!).  I’ll be sending those today (overnight if possible).

Oh… and if you’re wondering why I put a “™” after Christmas… it’s because the holiday has been totally commercialized.


Shopping madness

My wife and I went out and braved the unwashed masses yesterday to get our Christmas™ shopping done.

While we didn’t get it all done, we did manage to make a major impact into our list.

I can’t exactly go into details on what I purchased (as many a family member reads this blog), but I can say that I spent a lot of money.  So much, in fact, that it triggered an alarm at my bank.

When we got home, there was a message on the answering machine, asking me to call the bank.  According to the message, there was suspicious activity on my account and they wanted to verify that it was me.  I guess that happens when you never leave the house and only make a few purchases per month.

Of course, I called them and verified the charges (they were all me).  It would have been fun to say that I didn’t make any of them, but then again, that would have probably ended badly for me, so I was honest.

As for the shopping itself, I did pick up a few items that we’ren’t gifts: a set of spring form pans for baking cheese cakes, a 2 quart sauce pan (I desperately needed a second one), and a few other items for the kitchen.  Yes… I’m very damn domestic.


All I want for Christmas™ is…..

It’s that time of year again… that time when I put out both of my hands and say “Pleeeeeease!!!”.

For those of you who are looking to dump stupid amounts of money on their favorite web dude, I’ve prepared a list for you!  What?  I’m not your favorite web dude?  Well, spend stupid amounts on me anyway!


Here’s a wish list of sorts for your consideration:


Oh man… I loves me some music.  One can never EVER have enough.  One band I don’t have any CD’s from (and that’s on ly because I can’t seem to find them locally) is Icehouse.  Any album(s) will do.


I really only have one request on DVD… and it’s a damn big one.  But you love me more than any other web monkey, don’t you?  Yes you do!  That’s why I’m asking for Stargate SG-1, The Complete Series Collection

Computer Stuffs

Ok… this is where the list get’s pretty cheap, all things considered.  I really need a new mouse pad and a larger thumb drive (an 8GB would be great!!!).  These items have links to where they are on the web… and they’re both dirt damn cheap!!

There’s a lot of other stuff I’d like, but any of those items would make me very, VERY happy.  And a happy webmaster posts happy content.

You do like happy content, don’t you?  Of course you do!


How I entertain my self

With nothing but time on my hands, I have to find things to do other than watch the crap they call “daytime TV” (which, by the way, sucks balls).  So… when I’m not in a drug induced comma, I have a couple of games I play.

The Kingdom of Loathing is a free online game that’s a little different than most games you might have played.  It’s an online adventure game where all the monsters are hand drawn, the writing is incredibly funny, and it takes little to no skill what so ever.  It’s also quite fun (and funny!!).  Here’s an example:

You’re fighting  Quinn “Pencil-Thin Mustache” Shafer, the Guy Who Casually Brushes Up Against You Way Too Often for It to Be a Coincidence

You hear a series of squelching noises coming from behind a dumpster. Even though a faint alarm bell sounds in your head, you walk over to investigate the source of the sound. You see a hobo hunched over, rocking back and forth.

“Uh… are you all right?” you ask. “What are you doing back there?”

The hobo looks up and grins. “Masticatin’!” he says, and sticks out his tongue to show you what’s on it. “I found a whole bin full of bacon grease back here, and I’m masticatin’ with it!”

“That’s absolutely disgusting,” you say.

“‘Masticatin’ means ‘chewin’!'”

“I know that. It’s still disgusting.”

The hobo stands up and drops his bacon grease. “Them’s fightin’ words,” he says.

You get the jump on him.

You examine your staff to figure out which end is the business end, then you hit him with the business end of your staff for 5368 (+33) (+3) (+30) (+3) damage. CRITICAL HIT! SMACK! BONK! ZAP! SPLAT! POW! SOCKO! SOCKO! BONK! BAM! BIFF!

You win the fight!

The other game that eats up a lot of my time is Novus Sector’s RF Online.  It’s a MMORG that doesn’t take much computer horse power to run, is huge, and in my opinion, is a lot of fun.

I run with a guild called the Lumenaries™ (yeah… we even have our own website!).  My name in game is Bioland and I’m a race of robots called the Accretia.  Basically, you run around killing monsters for items and you also have to battle other races from time to time.

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